A Sad Day for Momma

Today was the day hoped for during long hours of walking the halls at church with a fidgety baby but also the day not hoped for since that would signal another end to babyhood. Kyle went to nursery today the whole time by himself. It was a crazy busy day at church with everything backwards because of youth conference testimony meeting. Don had to teach priesthood and primary was chaos so Kyle just had to go. Cody took him for about 5 minutes but then he needed to go class so he left. I spent that hour and forty five minutes with my eye glued to the peephole as much as I could. He cried at first especially while another little girl cried but then he was just a lap baby on sister Ramos the rest of time. He did sit down and eat snacks but then immediately held his arms up to be held. We have some sweet sweet ladies in nursery so he was well taken care of. I just had a hard hard time with it. When I was able to get him when it was over and he saw me his face just scrunched up in tears and he was clamoring to get to the floor trying to get to me. I scooped him up and we both cried for a minute. Man! Separation anxiety is brutal! The rest of the day he has been right behind me and not letting me out of his sight. He wouldn't let anyone hold him but me during sacrament meeting and he wanted to be right in my arms all the while I was trying to cook dinner. All the boys tried their best to distract him and let me cook or clean up but he wouldn't have that very long! Tonight he is in the bed with me even though the last few nights he has done really well in his own bed. Tonight he just stands there and cries and whimpers mama and I just can't stand it. He was laying down for a minute but then he would stand back up and cry again. I've had an emotional week so listening to my baby cry makes me cry. So we will toss and turn together in the big bed in his room and hope that tomorrow he will know his momma will always come back even if she is just going to the potty!